RASCALLY RABBIT BROTHEL TRASHCORE TEE

Congratulations, you sick little freak. You’ve just stumbled onto the worst shirt on the internet.

Introducing the Rascally Rabbit Brothel Tee, a filthy love letter to imaginary strip clubs, horny cartoon mascots, and the golden era of 1-900 numbers your uncle absolutely called from the family landline. This isn’t just a shirt – it’s a wearable cry for help.

Front graphic features two aggressively traced bikini babes, a fake Albany address, and a hotline that definitely doesn’t work (but if it did, it’d charge $4.99 a minute to insult your masculinity). The back? A smug, dead-eyed rabbit in a top hat who looks like he sells coke behind a bowling alley and calls it “entrepreneurship.”

Perfect for:

Guys who still say “baby girl” unironically
People who peaked during LimeWire
That one friend who “almost opened a bar once”
Anyone whose wardrobe screams, “My probation officer doesn’t care what I wear.”
This shirt is oversized, black as your soul, and made of organic cotton because we like the irony of eco-friendly sleaze. You're welcome.

• 100% organic combed ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 5.9 oz./yd.² (200 g/m²)
• Oversized fit
• Set-in sleeves
• Dropped shoulders
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Self-fabric neck tape on the inside of the back
• The fabric of this product is certified by GOTS (Global Organic Textile Standard)
• The fabric of this product is OEKO-TEX Standard 100 certified and PETA-Approved Vegan
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh

Size guide